I am furious.
Today I went to he the ,much hyped Rang De Basanti. BUT wait..this is not a movie review, this is anything but that. I am not furious at the movie( which btw i could be, but i'll post a long post on that).
I feel strongly about this issue. When it says on the screen, that please switch off your cell phones and pagers(do people still use them), you are supposed to switch off your cell phone and pages. Now you might be think, "yeah right, the nation tells us to have protected sex, but i see no one buying condoms", yeah but then only 2 people are getting affected by that, two stupid people i must say. however with the cel phone thingee, the whole theatre(due to reverberence) gets pissed off.
While i was getting all comfortable in the seats, man PVR has great seats, though their cup holders need a major makeover, and the movie was great, made me laugh for the first half every second(hey wait, nothing bout the move now), every now and then there are cell phones beeping. I wanted to stand up, unzip my zipper, piss all over the crowd, screaming :WHAT PART OF SHUT YOUR FUCKING CELL PHONE DONT YOU UNDERSTAND?". yeah. right.
The first instance, was quite normal. Phone rings. Man receives the call
Hao bhai, bolo miyan?

sachi mein bhai?

kyaa yaaron...

arre bhai picture pe mast scene dikh rela baap.

potte mast acting shacting kar rele....

this went on for about a minute.
now lets analyse that conversation.
the guy said that the actors were acting well. hey why not call the news paper and give them a running commentry about how you feel after each scene bitch.

exhibit b

some real lame ass ring tone, ya know, tough guy trying to be cute, ya know gentle giant sorta thing.
Hey man, just watching RDB...

man this is awesome *beep*

sacchi?

no ways man

acchcha i'll come there and then we'll discuss about that thing.

yes and tell to come.

critical comment:
.RDB makes rang de basanti sound like a cheap struggling beer company.
.smart people can understand what *beep* means

and then there was this one:

hello

arre mummy

picture dekhroon

picture ammie

arrey chal rahi hai.

ghar aakar baat karte, abhi kya ammie

nahi mujhe woh nakko, baad mein dekhenge

hao aakpe liye kuch lane ka hai kya?

hao

hao

nakko

hao

mmm, theek hai. shukriyah

critical comment:
no comments

the same guys phone rings again

hao kya re itne din, koi phone nahin? bhool gaya kya bhe *beep*

eh chal be *beep*

teri *beep*

picture dekh roon,

it was at this moment that his pal told him to switch off his phone, and after initial protest, he agreed. the irony was, at this moment, the actors in the movie were getting beaten to death during the lathi charge.

critical comment: what the hell man. whats all this? why should he talk to his long lost buddy in here? this is a place where fatsos like me come to watch a movie,after a long time must i add that, not losers like him, talk on and on their phone. agar dost se itna hi pyaar hai, phir movie sekhne kyun aaya be.
I think something ought to be done.
Its not right. The sound reflects in the theatre and even the slightest of murmuring can be a pain in the ass. You have see the larger picture( pun intended)
I feel that there should be a guy with a electric shock machine cornering any one uses these phone. the phone should be seized and returned withzero talktime and the guy should be electricuted.
I agree if its an emergency, lik an accident or someting, then its fine, but talking on the phone as though you are in your living room, with no pants on is just not required in the theatre. I feel strongly about this.
There are a gazillion other issues I feel strongly about. One of them is to do with promoting mediocrity. Will talk about that someother time.