On faith

...Swearing to God was the ultimate act. If you swore to God and it turned out that you were wrong, even by accident, even just a little, you still had to go to hell. That was just the rule and God didn't bend that rule for anybody. So the moment you said it in any context you started to feel uneasy in case some part of it turned out to be slightly incorrect...

-Bill Bryson, The Thunderbolt Kid

Travel Woes

This is how things are supposed to work.

When a businessman is diversifying his empire after having monumental success with his existing ventures, and the newer ventures also cater to more or less the same audience, and on top of that he builds personal relations with these customers and adds that ‘you-are-doing-business-with family’ feeling, or the even more popular, ‘I’d-rather-die-than-double-cross-you’ attitude, after a point of time you fall for it and hope that it works out for the best.

And then you realise that he is instead outsourcing his work from people who clearly don’t look like they’d win the credibility award. Still, you expect that the deal would be satisfactory since his being involved gives it some sort of credibility (if not certification).I am obviously talking about the hawker outside my hostel that’s running a taxi service, a food stall amongst other activities.

What you certainly don’t expect is to get off from your flight and having to search half and hour with your luggage for your cab whose driver is conveniently sleeping and has parked the car in the most mathematically distant spot. Also what you don’t expect, is to be greeted to the intoxicated aroma of his guzzle-fest and possible debauchery and for your own good beg to the one up there that its all to do with the previous trip.Once the driver opens his eyes, your suspicion is strengthened for that’s the deepest hue of red you’ve ever seen. But then come on you could be just over-reaction. The poor chap just got up from his sleep, what do you expect?He opens his mouth and your assumption is validated.

Your pals in the campus few hundred miles away are busy challenging one another to online races, little do they know that your are in a little NFS Death-Guaranteed of your own with last second cuts, screeching sounds and the works. With your heart in your mouth, you tend to ignore little such as “Hey this isn’t the car I booked in the first place. I wanted a Tavera, I got a Sumo” or “It’s the dustiest place in the world, yet the dude want to let down all the windows”.

Every time I make up my mind that I am surely not booking my cabs using this chap and every time I end up doing exactly that.

Suggestive though of the Day

The only grinding I got to experience was in a Delhi Bus to Noida
-Anonymous

Spirit of HOLI

A western song that capture the spirit of Holi in entirety
Purple Haze

Catch them Young

There was an interesting proposal (which clearly started off as a rant against the system) which my friend concocted as we were talking about the pros and cons of Indian education.

The bulk recruiters ( you know who you are), who visit campuses in huge Volvo buses and simply engulf the students with arms wide open and snatch away a sizable portion of the population only to dump them into their cramped workspace, my friend had an idea for these guys.

For most (almost all) of these companies, the only prerequisite (if any) is that the candidate must be aware of basic C programming and can to a certain extent speak English. And oh yes, pass off that rigorous aptitude test they so carefully set ages to make.

My friend proposes that they should instead hire students (read outsource) directly from the tenth standard (or at the most 12th) for by then the student is highly comfortable with C, C++, HTML etc. I don’t think that the folks at my college who made it to these companies ever learned anything beyond the school syllabus, or even if they did, it’s certainly of no use to the company. The aptitude tests? Surely, a tenth grade student has a better chance at cracking them for he’s a seasoned problem solver (thanks to various comics and dailies). This way the companies can heavily cut down on the costs and also get most of their work done. Students can then learn the other stuff (such as Java and other computer languages) while on the job or can opt for technical courses.
The companies can approach the school authorities formally or ask the bloke in the administrative unit for the student roster (a transaction would take place obviously), quite similar to what web2.0/Insurance companies are using banks for. Or they can even hold their tests on one of the hazaar Sundays in a little hall down the street.
After four years of education if you are going to end up in one of these companies doing the same thing that you learned while in school, then why not go for it right after school?
The point being that the bus companies (for that’s what they truly are) know what they’re looking for, so then why not start off at the grassroot level?

Posted simultaneously on Mutiny.in

Marketing Practice

Okay, now I do understand that you need to market your product in order for it to capture the interest of your target audience. And one way the corporates do it is by showing happy people endorsing the product, or rather showing that the people are happy with the product. But seriously, this happy?
He's not won a lottery you know.
Now German wing knows better and they go for the more sober yet cheerful look. The confident smile and the not-so-tight grip on the notebook shows that the man under scrutiny is quite content with the security a Norton Antivirus provides his precious work with. Unlike the ultra ecstatic yuppie on top, the German endorser looks just the type who would lure potential buyers into possessing one of these CD's and not let them have doubts about the products efficiency.

Guess part of it has something to do with all of us being cynics inside. No one can stand someone being too happy with a product ( Which is probably another reason why we just can't stand Linux or Apple users)

Jailbreak

Reminiscent of the Shawshank Redemption, the Chilean Policemen discovered( much to their amusement) a tunnel, equipped with ventilation and noise barriers.

The 279-foot (85-meter) long tunnel resembled an underground mine structure, built with cement and wooden beams and boasting electrical power and carts for hauling away dirt and rock.

Read more

Back

The Singapore trip was a blast indeed. It does feel great when everything has been paid for. Met up with a couple of pals from school. Respect for the SMU and the NTU campuses!

The quiz didn't go too well. We didn't win, but hey, we're getting IPODS which isn't that bad considering the runners up get 3 days in Singapore (we decided to stay 2 extra days there by extending our tickets)

The other teams were great fun, especially BIT-Mesra, IITB and NIT-Trichy.

All said and done, Delhi metro is better than Singapore MRT.

You can enter anytime you like, but you can never leave

The social networking websites bombarded the internet as we entered the new millennium and have being continuing to do so till date. First it was Orkut which made the public go mad (at least in Swadesh) but that was until the cleaner and sleeker Facebook arrived. Just as how there was a social class created amongst the social networking sites in the US where the educated University going people migrated to Facebook from the ubiquitous Myspace, where every layman had an account.

That was the past.

The future is a nightmare.

Facebook is as cluttered as a college going student’s room. It’s got a list of hazaar applications. It’s just the most irritating thing on the planet. It’s got a widget for everything and I mean everything. I get a million quizzes a day which will compare my performance to the three hundred pals’ of mine and then analyse them. Facebook has been minting a lot of money from these. So once you’re fed up of this you think to yourself that I just want to get out of this mess and so you deactivate your account. But here’s the catch: deactivating your account doesn’t delete your profile, which still exists on Facebook’s servers. Quitting it isn’t as easy as you’d have thought. The manual process makes you sweat more that you’d have at those cricket coaching sessions. As this article rightly says:

Mr. Das — who described his plight by quoting lyrics from the Eagles song “Hotel California” that say, “You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave” — has found himself cast as an unlikely mascot for disgruntled Facebook users. Several of them have found his empty profile and sent him messages, “ranging from Eagles song quotes to those of support,” he said.

I joined Facebook out of sheer peer pressure. Everyday I’d check my inbox and what would greet me were five new messages from my contacts from Orkut asking me to join Facebook. When I finally did, I realised that I had way too many contacts on Orkut, so now I had to accept all those guys all over again and has to confirm how I was connected to them and anticipate their writings on my wall.
I compelled to start-up with a social community meant for people who are sick of all the other communities.

Posted simultaneously at Mutiny.in

Dotted

I had two mutually exclusive discussions with Atin ad Saurya where I proposed the following theory.

Dots make a word/statement profound regardless of its intellectual/factual weight.

For example: The word 'Believe'. Suspended by itself, it doesn't really grab your interest nor would you give it another look if you saw it as someone's gtalk status message. But place three dots in front of it and the word suddenly becomes of super dense and profoundly profound. 'Believe...', there's so much hope and power in that word now. It's almost as the revamped version urges the looker to take action and awakens the activist which lives amongst everyone of us. And before you know there's music in the background inspiring you to the brim

Another example: 'God hates us all', well this just sounds like a guy cribbing. Again place the magic dots and voila!

God hates us all...

This would make an atheist out of anyone.

P.S: Heard it through the grapevine that one of the suggestions for the theme of this year's techfest, APOGEE was Soch...think

Ahoy!

After applying to them for the second time, I am finally on board. I like being part of group blogs. This one puts special emphasis on voicing ones opinions. As they themselves say:

"We don't want a 100 word post that ends with a question."

This is going to be fun.

P.S:The link to the site has been put up on the sidebar under the "Contributor subheading"

Small talk

There's a wheel that keeps rolling. Most of us relate it to joys and sorrows, or rather still, good and evil and so on. Truth is, it encompasses everything, it's just that the spotlight is cast when a particular feature transcends the rest, usually associated with something dramatic. Another rather peculiar observation is that people who claim to be atheists, agnostic and spiritual-not religious also quite regularly use the phrase "Oh god!", "omfg", "For god's sake". The last one of the lot being my favorite for it portrays human nature oh so well.

This week if plotted on a graph sheet, satisfaction versus date, would give a x(power n) function. Hopefully, it continues this way.

The first cycle of the great test fest has come to a temporary halt, with the second innings about to commence in a short while which should give just about enough time to take a bath.
Also, summer is inching closer. I can already spot kutcha clad boys roaming the streets of the campus, welcoming the cool breeze into their groins.

Now for the main news:
WOOHOO!
WOOHOO!

I am going to Singapore to represent BITS -Pilani in the IMS Quotient 2008. The semi finals will be hosted there. We're amongst the top 8 teams out of more than 5000 teams all over India who took part in the contest. Lots of prizes up for grabs. Hopefully we'll put on a good show there as well. This week is going to be expensive, with all those assured treats that I have to give.

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Wish

Please please please, could the couriers and postal department just stop working for the next couple of days.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

Lets see!

Not all monkeys are to be worshipped!

Cornered!

Posts by Navin & Abhilash about how blogging might affect the corporate scenario later on made me think about whether blogging is really as impressive as we made it sound.

On one hand, you can use your blog to advertise your products as is exercised by Malcolm Gladwell and Seth Godin. There is surely a huge market for Viral bloggers out there, but that's when you use it with corporate intentions, what about ones personal log entries where one opines?

What if in the future( or is it being done already) recruiters start to scan your social networking accounts and blogs in order to get a real insight into your personality? Would that be ethically correct on their part? And would it be smart on your your part to go around exercising your free speech and maybe jeopardize an opportunity coming your way( mind you the other way is also possible)?

I can think of anonymous accounts or rather under a pseudonym as a suitable alternative to this issue. The reason I say this is because:

1. While your anonymous, you have the power of choice as to whom to disclose your identity to.

2. You can fully be vocal about your issue without thinking twice about the repercussions as as your corporate life is concerned.

WWF

‘Matches 145, clash!’

‘Oh shit! I can’t believe your Undertaker beat me!’

The melee of card clutching youngsters could be seen everywhere. School buses, corners of class rooms (when the teacher wasn’t looking obviously), canteens and homes. WWE (then WWF) was truly a sensation. In an era when Playstations hadn’t quite become available (leave alone affordable, wait a second, are they affordable yet?) to the Indian market and computer games hadn’t graduated above those that required a RAM of greater than 16 MB (ah, sweet reminiscence), WWE ruled. It was a plague, every kid would clutch on to it as though it were his life savings, religiously following the sport on TV. Cheering the face, cussing the heel and becoming a theist whenever a bra and panty match would take place, WWE had taken over.

The story line would be discussed over the lunch break with enthusiasm far exceeding that of when some folks sit down and chat about which soap had the maximum number of divorces. A difference of opinion would invoke fights of the highest order and would sometimes create havoc and even destroy friendships (and forge new bonds).

I would buy thermocol once every fortnight and would make a virtual table out of it. Then we’d have the greatest of all matches- TLC. The sheer joy of lifting my 12 year old langotiya yaar and pushing him through the chasms of hell and breaking the pseudo table (and hence winning the game according to the self imposed rules) would easily overshadow another moment. Glory indeed!

We would also partially heed their advice, the famous ads where the gods would themselves ask us to “not try this at home!” No kicking, no punching at the “shame shame”. We’d share their joy, their grief during the darkest hour and cheer them, these neo-gladiators with bodies of steel.

Post 2004, I gave up on wrestling. The unbelievable solace that WWF provided couldn’t be matched by the unbelievably juvenile plots of WWE. I didn’t see myself cheering these new stars for they didn’t have the same zeal, nor did they seem loyal to the game. And the old ones didn’t seem the same as before. They seemed to have evolved into something more commercial, someone the fans couldn’t associate with.

Or maybe I grew up.

Analysing Movies

Rachit's post motivated me to go to the supposedly last Recreational Activity Forum ( RA F) movie.

The movie was Shehanshah.

Yes, yes I quite understand. The only well documented fact about this movie seems to be the monologue from the omnipresent savior of humanity, "Rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagte hain, Naam hai Shehanshah"

But as I sat in the auditorium with several other mourners I realized that the character of Shehanshah is quite a smart chap. Not only has he a good sense of economy, he knows which role to play when. Now this is something lacking in Superheroes and many unsuccessful entrepreneurs.

He is a cunning chap. Police officer in the morning and a crime fighting superstar studded in black (with a steroid enhanced arm covered in silver) once the sun sets. He doesn't shy away from his duties nor does he give up on the money making opportunities that come his way. He takes bribes from the goons and pretends to be the stereotypical police officer, slacking on the job, chewing that pan which seems to replenish its juices on its own. But come dusk and he transforms into this mean crime fighting hirsute machine with an uber cool baritone.

So lets sum up Shehanshah then:

He acts like a lazy bum while on his day job, networking with high socialites and businessman and maintaining contacts and gathering enough information which he later uses to his advantage while he is "bustin' ass" in the night. He's earning decent too, with all those leather briefcases he's acquiring. And well its only fair, crime fighting is after all a job and why shouldn't one demand a compensation for one's services? The great thing here is that he's also portraying a clean image to the public.

And yes he gets the girl as well.

It had always been a curiosity of mine regarding the mode of income of Superheroes.

These are the Superheroes we need to worship, who have a keen eye for a good deal.

P.S: Meenakshi Sheshadri was surely well endowed back in the day.

Fornication to save Rainforests!

People are always on the look out for some innovative ideas. As is the case in most start ups, the primary idea isn't anything revolutionary, its something ordinary, something which makes us go like "Yeah, so?" but what matters is how you implement it.

A Norwegian organisation which goes by a self explanatory name Fuck For Forests(FFF) has sex in public places to raise money for saving the rainforests. Now I was scandalised as well deeply impressed by the idea. On one hand the idea of having sex in public is still a taboo if not unacceptable in most countries. On the other hand they are raising money for a cause.

The idea receives cent per cent on innovation. The reason I say this is:

However noble be the cause, you can't expect to take money from people if you don't give them something in return. FFF gives it target audience exactly what it wants in return for saving the world's rainforests.

They have sex in public, they have sex on stage during concerts, basically they have sex anywhere they can.

After their first year they made nearly 100,000 USD from their website by selling merchandise and membership.

The problem from this sort of start-up can be that they'll be mostly on their own. I don't see any huge NGO (WWF doesn't accept their money) or Govt Organisations coming forward to help start-ups like FFF. The internet proxies will add to their woes. Also their reach will be quite limited as far as on ground activities are concerned, not many countries are that liberal to public pornography.

But despite that they still have a huge base according to me. If your product is good, people will buy it, the same applies to porn as well. They might not be able to have hoardings and bill boards, but I can safely assume that word of mouth publicity for a venture like this can work just fine. Also, I don't think the initial investment for this would've been anything significant.

FFF is currently working on projects with tribes and locals in the Amazon rainforests.